- On the occasion of Valentine's Day, some lovers will offer naughty gifts.
- Among the bestsellers, there are scented lubricants or massage candles.
- But in terms of dildos and other penis sheaths, there is rather in the register of purchase and use solo.
It's the lovers' day. The opportunity for some to think of ways to spice up a naughty evening. For besides chocolates and flowers, there are other pleasures that some choose to offer: those who buy themselves in sex-shop. Fur cuffs,
scented lubricants and other massage candles are some of the best sellers of the naughty gifts that can be made. But the offer is much broader, and also includes some toys a little more spicy, like vibrating rings, dildos for these ladies or prostatic stimulators for these gentlemen. However, does one offer as easily to the elected of his heart a sex toy as a box of chocolates? How is this gift coming off the beaten path?
Cute sex toys and play kits to use with two
Front pastel shades, deco neat, when you pass the doors of the Paris lovestore The Passage du Desire in the Marais, the atmosphere is very different sex shops to the thick red velvet curtain of Montparnasse district or Pigalle. And it is not a coincidence because here, it is rather the women who push the doors of these temples of pleasure and which pass to the cash register. And what pleases them a lot on Valentine's Day, "these are kits, packages for a naughty evening, which include for example a massage oil and a small accessory like a vibrating ring" says Alice, who works in the Parisian lovestore. "Women have become more open to these issues through certain series, and the attraction of new accessories playful design," said Dr. Patrick Papazian, sexologist and author of Tell me about love (ed.The Opportun). They want to explore new things, have a
sexuality more playful and inventive ". Anna, in her thirties, has planned "a cherry lubricant and a vibrating ring to spice up the Valentine's night with [son] lover. It's for fun, test something a little fun.
And often, it is dragged by their darling by these gentlemen discover these new shops for adults. "Last year, after a small romantic restaurant in Montmartre for Valentine's Day, coming down on Pigalle, curiosity pushed us to enter a big sex shop that was more naughty supermarket than the little gloomy thing, tells the young man. We took a little thing, and Madame was much less embarrassed than me to be there, which seemed to be the case for all the couples present in the shop ". A finding shared by the sexologist: "In these shops, men always seem to wonder what they do there and walk headlong three steps behind their partner. Women, they find it amusing.
And besides the massage candles and vibrating rings that are popular with the buyers for Valentine's Day, the 2019 vintage also gives pride of place to a small egg reserved for the pleasure of gentleman. "It's to use for a game of male masturbation, the base of the egg is removed and then the egg is put like a little cap on the male organ, says Alice. It is a small object cute and cute, fun and neat design, it brings a bit of spice on the part of women and it's not scary for men, it's an opportunity to have fun a little during the preliminaries.
Big sex toys bought and used solo
Valentine's Day is an opportunity to explore new pleasures for two. But for some accessories promising ecstasy, the purchase is rather solo, for solo use. And it's valid for both men and women. "I would not dare to offer a dildo to my girlfriend, says Raphael, it's quite embarrassing as a gift. Something a little more subtle like massage oils or a game why not, but it stops there. Same point of view for Thomas: "Everyone desires and desires in his relationship, but a sex toy is relatively personal," says the young man. Does this mean it's taboo? "Surely," he replies, "I do not see myself announcing that I bought a sex toy from my partner, I would be uncomfortable." And if Anna found it funny to do some shopping in a lovestore, "I would never give my guy a sex-toy vaginette, it would not even come to my mind. Not only is it embarrassing to buy and offer, but I would see myself even less use it with him. "
Why this embarrassment? "In reality, sexuality is not necessarily much more liberated or simpler, it is adorned with a lot of modesty, and the sex-toy is the representation of this, says Dr. Papazian. Women have become more open to these issues through certain series, and by the attraction of playful design accessories. But men are not open to sex toys at all, they have not yet made their revolution on this terrain, they are not ready, even under the influence of their own. companion ".
Some diagrams under the quilt would still have a hard life. "We are still in a very phallo centred sexuality, continues the sexologist, and the man has a fairly Freudian sex toy. He considers that the best sex-toy is him, so he is clearly not open to his use in the couple. Especially since the use of a sex toy launches the idea that sexuality without accessories is not enough fun, sex toys are for those who can not find the way to 'a renewal of their sexuality, whereas it is a way in itself'. Would men be afraid of being replaced by a silicone and battery-powered object? "The sex-toy inspires a form of fear, competition from an object that might be able to provide at least as much sexual pleasure to them as their partner, there is a disturbing, even humiliating side. And it's the same for women, they will not offer sex toys like a vagina to their mate. There is in this category of sex toys a side "substitute" that may be disturbing within the couple.
* Sexually incorrect. Free your desire. Sex does not have a gender, La Martinière editions, 17,50 euros.