“I am legally nothing to my son!” : become a mother by surrogacy, she is waiting to adopt her child

Examinations, diagnosis, sterility. And suddenly, dizziness. “I was 39, my husband 42 and no time to waste,” recalls Alice. “But there is no question of giving up becoming parents. “Ruling out from the outset the idea of ​​adoption, the couple, living in Reims, turned to another avenue: that of surrogacy (surrogacy). “In the United States, it’s 150,000 euros. In Ukraine, three times less. But the information is vague and difficult to confirm in France. In any case, we understand that beyond ethical questions, we can radically change a woman’s life. The couple get married in the summer of 2020, as required by Ukrainian law, and set off for Kiev.

The obstacle course begins a month later. While the father, Stéphane, entrusted his gametes to science on the spot, their fertility center, Ilaya, suddenly went bankrupt. The Rémois left 25,000 euros there (partly recovered today) and as many sleepless nights. “But we promised ourselves that the financial question would not count for founding our family. We immediately looked for another agency. »New contract: 44,000 euros.

An effect of the bioethics law

And this time it works. Dad’s gametes are finally transferred for in vitro fertilization which takes place at the end of December. “Two days later, the surrogate mother, whom we had only seen in photos, received the embryo”, summarizes Alice. The couple follows, day after day and until the big trip, the pregnancy from a distance. “Our son was born on September 20 and a few minutes later he was in our arms. “

Alas, the story does not end there. Because if Stéphane has officially become a parent, Alice, not. “It was played out within a few weeks, with the bioethics law passed on August 2. Until now, we could leave the country with the total transcription of the birth certificate in French and a passport … We only had a pass for 30 days and if something happens to my husband, I am legally nothing to my son. “

This summer, the civil code was indeed completed, specifying that the recognition of parentage abroad should be “assessed under French law.. » For children born of surrogacy, the transcription of a foreign civil status certificate is thus limited to the only biological parent, the second parent said to be “intended” having to go through adoption. “It is the public prosecutor in Nantes who will rule, as for all children born abroad. We are patient. »Not without considering, meanwhile, a second GPA.